There is a video going around on Facebook that Dove put out about how women see themselves versus seeing another woman. It’s a very powerful video, a video that struck really close to home with me.
I judge myself really harshly. I’ve always had pretty high standards for myself, and easily beat myself up when I fail to achieve something or make a stupid mistake. But more than that, I’m very hard on myself physically more than any other way. I compare myself to other women constantly, and not usually in a good way. They always come out on top, always having some better feature than I do. I’m never pretty enough and despite all my other amazing qualities and attributes, in my mind, my flawed body makes everything else much less meaningful. But, I’m told that to be attractive to someone, I have to be confident, and it just sends a confusing message to my brain. On one hand, I’m supposed to look a certain way, on the other, I’m supposed to embrace who I am and be OK with it. While the second option sounds the best, my past dating experiences tell me that I should be pursuing the first instead.
I hate that our world is so focused on outward perfection. I hate our fashion industry. I hate how girls begin feeling “not good enough” BEFORE the age of 12. And I hate, hate, hate that somehow I got caught up in all of the lies! I hate how we treat people like commodities, discarding one to shop for someone better. We are constantly on the lookout for (and attempting to be) the perfect “one”. It’s simply impossible. But how do you change your way of thinking when it is so ingrained in you to do this? How do we just accept who we are, flaws and all and walk confidently in that? And how do we not become affected by the rejection from people based on our looks, past, present and future?