It’s only been 5 months….? (Part 1)

Hey world, it’s me again. Geez, I know, I know, where the hell have I been? Honestly, I don’t even know where to begin (everyone says that, right?). Let’s take it all the way back to post-Whole30 from last year, and I’ll try and be as brief as possible.

Winter is always a really challenging time for me mostly due to the holidays. It’s generally the time of year I feel loneliest and 2013 was no exception. In fact, it may have been one of the worst. Since I had finished the Whole30 and posted every day for that, I felt like I needed a break from writing and I slipped back into some crappy eating habits. Combined with the overall ickiness of winter, I started feeling like I wanted to just drop everything and skip town. So, I began contemplating a move. And it escalated quickly into applying for jobs and interviewing. Only a few people knew that I was considering this, but because of my personality, I jumped whole-heartedly into the process and was bound and determined to be out of Seattle by the end of the year. However, the universe apparently had different plans. Guys, I have never in my life been turned down for so many jobs, so I knew it must be a sign (yes, I believe in those).

Once I knew that I wasn’t going to be moving (over my Christmas vacation), I decided to throw myself into my life in Seattle and see if I could get myself out of this funk. I’m not going to say it was easy or fun, but day-by-day and with the amazing help of my therapist, I began to find contentment and joy in my life here.

Some of the bigger things that happened this year were:
 – No more CrossFit: While I loved it, I just couldn’t continue paying the price for it
 – Tried to buy a house: The market is ridiculously competitive so I decided to wait until it slows down again
 – Studied for and took a professional exam: Still waiting to hear if I passed but I’m mentally preparing to take it again in December.
 – Invested A LOT of money into concerts this year: I’ll explain more about that later.
 – I have been on exactly ONE hike this year: *insert stunned look now*
 
There have also been a lot of mental and emotional breakthroughs that I have had this year. The summer started out with me deciding to just try and focus on myself, learning to love myself, and deciding to just be happy where I am. I know that I am a person who is always striving for me, pushing myself in some capacity, never being kind to myself and just allowing myself to just be. And I always thought that was a good thing, but I began to notice that it was actually bad for me. I needed to take a break and learn how to challenge myself in a positive way, and to do that, I had to just be OK with being me, where I am, right now.

At the end of June, I told one of my best friends that I wanted to July to be the best month of the year. And you know what? It was! It was an incredibly fun month, filled with laughter and joy. And because I felt so good, that greatness has continued through August and I’m hoping it will just keep going forever. Obviously, I know we all have our crabby days and that’s OK, I’m talking more about the core of myself being happy.

Two of the bigger things that have happened to me this year have been over the past month. The first being the realization that I don’t think I want a traditional life. And the second one is that I’m pondering my artistic side. Both of these things are going to have their own posts because there’s just too much for one long, giant post.

Going back though, I do still want to continue getting healthy, losing weight and learning to eat better, I just don’t think it can be the center of my life all the time.

So, basically to sum up, you’re going to be seeing a lot of random posts on this site as I continue to figure out where I am, where I’m going, and my artistic endeavors. Here’s an updated pic of myself (my bangs are back!), and one of Ginger so you can see that she’s just as cute as ever. 🙂

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