I am so tired of dealing with rejection. Even just typing out the word exhausts me. I consider myself to be a very resilient person, someone who has overcome many odds. But, facing rejection for months on end has proven to break me down in ways that I can’t even articulate anymore.
I have been stuck in an unhappy place for months, not all day, every day, but in general. If you made my life into a trend-line, it would definitely be downward sloping on the happy scale. Me, being me, knows that I am the only person who can change that, so that’s what I set out to do. I set out to make myself happy by changing my circumstances. And every attempt has turned around and given me a big, fat “Fuck you.” right in the face. I have never in my life felt so worthless when it comes to my skills and career. At this point, I’m not even sure what to do.
So, that’s where I’ll leave it. Just….there.